Countries of Origin by Javier Fuentes

Author:Javier Fuentes [Fuentes, Javier]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Knopf Doubleday Publishing Group
Published: 2023-06-06T00:00:00+00:00

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By the time he got back to our camp, I had prepared a simple dinner of sandwiches with jamón serrano, manchego, sliced tomato, and a paste that I had improvised using local figs, olives, and garlic. For dessert, I made a basic ganache, melting dark chocolate in heavy cream, that I poured over raspberries.

We ate in silence. The drawings were so vivid that every time I looked at his face, I caught myself thinking about the man hooded in rubber. The moonlight reflecting off the sea illuminated the sky, and though we had readied a gas lantern, we didn’t need to turn it on. After dinner, I went to the sea to wash the metal plates while Jacobo made a fire. Rinsing off the utensils, thinking about the implied domesticity in the unspoken division of tasks, filled me with an inexplicable joy.

Sitting by the fire, we drank and smoked hash until our throats became sandy and our words began to slur. Jacobo, quieter than usual, took long gulps from the tequila bottle as if wanting to drown some interior voice.

“I want to live in this moment forever,” he finally said.

“Yeah. It’s totally magical.”

By now, a luminous amber moon hung low on the horizon, casting a sparkling line over the sea. Jacobo lay down and put his head on my thigh. I could sense his eyes staring at me. Facing the sea, I squinted, trying to make believe I had spotted something in the water. He grabbed my neck and pulled me toward him. I tried to think but my brain was full of smoke. He forced my face down until our lips touched. I pulled myself back. He grabbed my head again.

“Stop it, Jake!”

His face tensed. He closed his eyes with force and, holding on to my legs, struggled to sit up.

“I thought you liked me.” He was slurring his words.

A flapping swarm of bats materialized in front of us, their black wings a fleeting shadow against the fiery orange sky.

“Of course I like you. But let’s take it easy.”

“You could at least be brave and say it. It’s okay if you’re not into me. Or are you going to tell me you’re not gay?” He raised his voice. The black swarm fled in the opposite direction and entered a small cave.

“I don’t think in those terms,” I said, using the first thought that had materialized in my head, a sentence Chus used often and which bothered me immensely.

His face was lit by flares of fire, his eyes open wide. A spark landed on his shorts, and he let it burn out on its own, singeing them slightly.

“You know what?” He stood up. “Fuck you.”

The sound of the crackling fire became unnervingly louder.

“I’m sorry,” I said, trying to lower the temperature.

He staggered toward the edge of the rock, away from me.

“I’m sorry,” I repeated much louder, afraid of losing the only person I had.

I walked up to him and put an arm around his shoulders. He took a step forward and left my arm dangling, then turned around, furious.

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